Scene: Volume Four- inside the Castle/Building /Headquarters thingy:
Trude: “Welcome to our Ambiguous Headquarters and Sorcery Resort!
Our daily demonic rates are far better than my cousin Integra Wingates
Vampire Hunting Lodge, plus I wear a dress that emphasizes my cleavage!”
Angela: “Er, that’s great, but why did you bring us here?
And is the breakfast continental or full buffet?”
Trude: “I just wanted to point out to you that all the demons you’ve
thought you killed are not dead- which means this manga could go on forever!”
Meg (mutters under her breath): “Oh great, how many more times
do I have to hear Angela beg me to say her name and that I need her?
This is getting old- why can’t she just ask me for a naked romp
in the hot tub instead?”
Angela (stamps her foot): “Wait a minute- you mean we’ve
just wasted the last three volumes? That’s outrageous!”
Gertrude (snickers): “You think you’re pissed- what about
the suckers that paid money to read them?”
Meg: “Hey, you spoke? I thought you were disabled!”
Gertrude: “No silly, that’s dismembered.” (Pulls
off her arm to demonstrate).
Trude: “What did I tell you about showing off? Put that arm back
on, we may need it in the next chapter!”
Angela (smacks herself on the head): “You know, now that you mention
it, some of those demons did look familiar- and I just thought
it was a cheap budget with art recycling.”
Trude: “Wow, being alive for hundreds of years hasn’t made
you any smarter, has it?”
Angela (furious): “How dare you insult me! Do you know what
I am?”
Gertrude: “An immortal loli?”
Angela: “That’s right! Which means that everyone wants to
have sex with me!”
Meg (huffs): “Don’t be ridiculous! I’m a nun with T&A-
everyone wants to have sex with me!”
Gertrude: “T&A?”
Meg: “That’s right – tits and ammunition! Lead in the
bed, baby!”
Trude: “Can we get back to the topic at hand- these undead demons
that you just wounded for the last three volumes?”
Angela: “What about them? Let me guess, they’re coming back
again?”
Trude: “Yes, but now it’s more serious- because of all the
injuries you inflicted, they’re not only out for revenge, but…” (she
shivers and holds her hands to her face in fear).
Meg: “What ? What could possibly be scarier than that?”
Trude (trembling): “They’re coming back- with lawyers!”
Screams fill the air.
Angela: “Now I really wish I could die!”
Gertrude: “I’m so upset, both my legs just fell off!”
Meg: “Wait a minute- doesn't Phoenix Wright have a manga?
Maybe he could help us!”
Trude: “He’s off in Japan doing some musical right now- we’ll
just have to face them on our own!”
(Suddenly the walls crash down. Demons in suits with briefcases hurtle
into the room).
Demons: “Habeas Corpus! And outrageous re-spawning litigation fees!”
Angela (turns to Meg): “Tell me you need me- call my name, Meg.”
Meg: “Oh c’mon, we haven’t even been injured yet- can’t
you at least wait until we start fighting? I hate when you get all emo-loli
on me!”
Angela: “Please, I need to hear it….tell me.”
Meg: “Oh, I’m going to tell you something all right. Angela…” she
grabs Angela by the shoulders and leans inward to her.
Angela (swoons slightly): “Uh, yes?”
Meg: “I am telling you…SHUT UP!” |
